I’ve been undoubtedly struggling with my mental health lately. Fully immersing myself into my writing has gotten me through some of the worst days. Luckily, some of my best work is on my worst days. I completed a manuscript for my first children’s book a few months ago. There’s not much else I can say other than “it just came to me.”
Writing and Postpartum Depression
I feel safe when I’m writing. My pain and insecurity don’t eat me alive. I do my best not to force myself to write anything in particular. Instead, I allow inspiration to come to me in my everyday life. Then, I write.
Aspen Inspires the Most
This blog wouldn’t exist without my daughter. I wouldn’t be the writer that I am today without her. Hell, I would’ve never even fathomed writing a children’s book if it wasn’t for her.
Insomnia and Depression
Thoughts of potential blog posts keep me awake at night. An unfamiliar voice in my head kept me up one night in particular. I began to narrate in…rhyme? It began with thoughts of snuggling with my littlest cuddle nugget. She was in her bassinet by our bed, sleeping peacefully. I imagined how I wished she would be my littlest spoon forever. I wondered how and when she will gain her independence from me. My thoughts fell on the moon…doesn’t moon rhyme with spoon? Before I knew it I had a poetic line I simply couldn’t let go of. Matt rolled over groggily, wondering what I was up to.
I HAVE TO WRITE THIS DOWN!
The next day, I nonchalantly reviewed the note in my phone, assuming I was having delusions of grandeur. Nonetheless, it wasn’t half bad.
The words formed an ending; a clear finishing line for the story. I started to work backward on the narrative. Miraculously, the rhythmic voice in my head was still there!
I never had intentions of writing or publishing a book…let alone one in the children’s category, but it came so naturally to me.
I shot a text over to Matt after typing up a few lines. I jokingly insinuated that I was a literary genius. Little did I know, he was showing it around work because he was so impressed! I received validation that I didn’t even know I was searching for.
I took the bait and completed a solid manuscript. “The rest is history” so to speak.
What Keeps Me Going
My Littlest Spoon is the most worthwhile (un-baby related) thing I’ve done for myself since Aspen’s birth. Publishing a children’s book is no easy feat, but I know it will be worth it. It already is. The thought of holding the first copy in my hands and reading it to Aspen is all the motivation I need.
The verse that started it all:
As of the beginning of April, I have completed the final draft of my manuscript. The work has already been reviewed by a professional children’s book editor and I am actively working with a few illustrators to find the right visual for my story. View my journal for the latest updates and make sure you subscribe to follow along!
Visit the children’s book main page for a brief synopsis here.